Sunday, January 30, 2011

Secretly Single

There is an episode of "Sex and the City" where Carrie realizes she's not ready to live with someone. She enjoys her downtime and eating crackers standing up in the kitchen while thumbing through magazines. When she shares this with her best friends, she realizes that she is not alone. Miranda likes to put lotion on her hands and wear gloves to lock it in, and Samantha likes to... well, those who watch know what Samantha likes to do in her alone time. But, long story short (too late!) they dub these sometimes embarrassing habits "Secret Single Behavior".

I HATE FEET. I hate people's feet on me, I don't like my own feet, and I definitely do NOT like people touching my feet. I thought this would be a horrible trait in a relationship, but surprisingly, I have allowed my fiance into the inner sanctum: I actually let him give me foot rubs. I never would have thought this would be okay with me. EVER. But, love has it's perks.

However.

I realized that I still have some boundaries that are not going to stick once I get married. It's still a little frightening to think of sharing my entire life with someone. There's no more, "Oh, I'm so glad he's not here to see me like this!" Knowing we both need some down-time after our workdays is good, but what about the times when I need more than he does? Or a whole night to myself? Sometimes it all seems impossible, and then I remember that this is not a stranger I'll be living with, it's someone I deeply love. Does that make it easier? I don't know, but I think it'll take the edge off.

So, when my husband decides to take my socks off and rub my feet, will it bring me to tears the way it did a few weeks ago when my fiance sprang that move on me? Seriously, I was crying, so embarrassed and completely without reason other than the one I gave my fiance: winter feet. -shakes head- I guess my Secret Single Behavior was keeping my socks on in the winter so I don't have to paint my toenails. Sounds so silly, right? But it totally threw me, not being in control of that one thing that made me either comfortable or uncomfortable. Welcome to the rest of my life?
I hope I handle the rest of my life and all of those uncovered Secret Single Behavior moments with a little more finesse. I also hope that with HUNDREDS of wives who have gone before me, I'm not alone.

lots of love, B

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Slow down and sip your tea, already

I am waist deep in wedding plans.

I realized the other week that I had somehow gotten a month behind (how could that happen with all of those holidays? It's a mystery...) and was nearly overwhelmed at how much was left to do! I immediately contacted my wedding planner like a good little bride-to-be and began scheduling, online searches, magazine flipping and general haste-making in preparation. In short, I completely overloaded my brain with minutia.

Today, as I had only a few hours of a morning shift for one job and voice lessons in the afternoon, I decided it was time for tea. I changed back into my PJ's, filled the kettle, and clicked the unit into life. While waiting for the water to boil, I opened the cabinet to choose my tea combination and my eye caught The Box of Tea.

The Box of Tea is the tea that I bought on The Day my sweetheart and best friend proposed, before I knew it was going to be The Day. Knowing me as he does, he decided to take me to Charleston to the only tea plantation in North America and I, of course, went a little crazy in the gift shop. I am SO GLAD I allowed myself this seemingly small indulgence because when I pulled down The Box of Tea, I was immediately transported back to that wonderful day, reliving every detail and every joy and thought. Pouring the boiling water over one of those little tea bags made me remember the warmth of his hand around mine as we strolled through the shop. And the little Pot, Cup, and Saucer I bought will remind me of The Day every time I use it, long after The Box of Tea is gone. It may seem silly to some, but for me, it is wonderful, romantic, and a great reason to buy whatever you want in gift shops.

Well, maybe not that last one. =P

I'm reading a book right now called "Always the Baker, Never the Bride" about a small town pastry chef and how she gets roped into the wedding business. She is hired by a hotel manager who wants to turn the hotel into a one-stop wedding catch-all. Have I mentioned I would like to be transported into this book? It may not exactly be literature, but any character that presents high tea (complete with petit fours, tea pots, and other delicious treats) I can completely identify with.

Friday, January 7, 2011

Knitting incognito

Continuing with current birthday project, under an alias. As I still live with said birthday girl (my mama), I am pretending to amass knitted things for my future home with husband. So far, a success. I can knit in the open with no fear of discovery!

Speaking of "husband", the future one and I had one of those semi-scary and "wow, this is where it starts!" conversations about our living arrangement once we're married. Currently, he's living in a 1-bedroom apartment which is great for him, but wanted to renew his contract for another year... which means I would also be living in this 1-bedroom apartment... with all of my yarn... I don't think he realized the gravity of that situation.

It's amazing to me how much yarn is collected and actually USED for various projects over time. I can't bring myself to get rid of any of it because every shade of green or blue or red is not created equal! I need them all! Factor in various yarn weights and textures and you might as well forget the whole thing. Which is why I have currently 2 bags of yarn, one under-the-bed storage unit full, and one shelf full. I have to admit to being slightly ashamed... fortunately the only other living being dealing with this hoard is Mad-Eye, my fish, and since none of it winds up in his water, he doesn't seem to mind. Yet.

I'll end on a non-knitting, non-yarn note of coziness. Today while browsing free books on my Kindle (an EXCELLENT source for reading and knitting at the same time: No pages lost, no book to hold... amazing), I came across one titled "The Unofficial Harry Potter Christmas Cookbook". I immediately grabbed it up, of course. I'd seen "The Unofficial Harry Potter Cookbook", non-Christmas edition and was delighted that someone had taken all those amazing English dishes from the book and told me, stupid American that I am, what they actually were, AND how to make them! And now I have "Christmas" for all time. Get ready for the Yorkshire Pudding!!

Lots of love, -b