Thursday, February 3, 2011

Too fast, too slow...

Who was it who first noticed that when one area of your life seems to be going excellent well, the rest promptly falls apart? I think we can all identify with this cycle of life. Me? I'm smack in the middle of it.

For such a long time, all I wanted was to fall in love for real. To have my feelings returned. It seemed my lot in life to suffer the curse of the one-sided crush. Then I found my amazing fiance, who turned my whole world around (not to be cliche, but there it is) and filled in my other half.

So now that I've found love, what's to become of me? I'm trying to break into the world of private voice lessons - something I never thought I'd do, and have grown to deeply enjoy - but I seem to be constantly shut out of it. As soon as I get a new student, I lose an old one. Teenagers aren't the most reliable. They tend to spread themselves quite thin over different areas of study until they find something they like/enjoy/are good at. I never really did this. For me, it was always music, and any aspect of music I adored. It seems my students don't share this passion, or at least not completely. Poor things. Music is so fulfilling.

I guess on this overcast Thursday, as I lost yet another promising voice student to sports commitments, I am simply dreary. Slumpy. (I realize it's not a word, but you understood exactly what I meant when I used it, didn't you?) And wondering what to do with my life. With a birthday around the corner, I suppose it's natural. Almost everyone I've talked to about this point in life has said the same thing: it's all a transition.

Well, Sir Transition, you've got the better of me today. Tomorrow, I'll chalk all of this up to a large dose of Bronte. Perhaps too much.

much love, B

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